I know you had no intention of ousting me to society, but I venture to hope you understand that I could not have acted otherwise given the situation you placed me in, no matter what I believed your intentions to be. The unspoken terms of my other relationship would not have permitted otherwise; whether he felt safe staying was not my decision to make and certainly not mine to withhold from him.

You say you want us both to be happy, but you say you are jealous. You say you are angry that you not enough for me. I can tell you from my experience with marriage — admittedly limited in the real experience of it, but not in external observation of the marriages of others — I do not believe the situation you find yourself in is unique. In fact it seems rather absurd to me to believe that a person should rely on one other for the fulfillment of all of their needs and the actualization of all their desires. To be the unburdening of every mental load, the comfort of every emotional turmoil, the realization of every sexual drive, the culmination of every future hope — it feels utterly ridiculous to suppose one person should be so wholly responsible for the wellbeing of another. I cannot be this for you. I was never seeking this for myself.

I do not, and could never, loathe you. But neither can I be what you have very clearly required of me, which is why I have said reconciliation is impossible.

---

The following 1 user Likes Emrys Selwyn's post:1 user Likes Emrys Selwyn's post
   Angelica Selwyn