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Witch Weekly · October 24, 2021 – 7:15 PM

Which Impending Disaster Will Be Your Doom?

After a hurricane hit the Sanditon and deprived several society figures of their lives, it seems clear that most of us are marked for an early death in some sort of disaster. This is hardly the first mass-death event to hit our community; in fact, it isn't even the first of the year! Which catastrophe will claim your life? Take our quiz to find out.

Describe your circle of friends.
a. Rambunctious and a bit unorthodox.
b. Pretty and popular; the sorts of people you want to know
c. Superficial - I'm not sure how well I really know any of them
d. Bound by common interests
e. Small, but close and comfortable.

You're planning an event. Where do you host it?
a. A space unique to the event, like a track for horse racing.
b. A foreign destination with guests arriving by portkey
c. Hogsmeade Memorial Ballroom
d. Outdoors, weather (or weather charms) permitting.
e. At my home or a relative's home, so we can plan every detail early.

Which of the following skills would you be least likely to succeed at?
a. Healing, though I could manage basic first-aid
b. Swimming
c. Anything that requires quick wandwork
d. Apparition
e. Needlepoint

Choose a Tarot card.
a. The Tower
b. The Moon
c. The Lovers
d. Wheel of Fortune
e. The Hermit

What's your favorite drink?
a. Cocktails or punch
b. Champagne
c. Wine
d. Lemonade
e. Tea

What's your biggest personal flaw?
a. I am judgemental
b. I don't always think through my decisions
c. I can be difficult to get along with
d. I don't adapt well to new circumstances
e. I'm too quiet

Mostly As While your actual end is too occluded for our Seers to predict, rest assured that it will be suitably tragic, and that you will survive more than your fair share of calamities before it occurs.

Mostly Bs A waterborne catastrophe awaits you, but never fear; after the shipwreck and the hurricane this year we likely won't be due for another ocean-adjacent disaster for at least another three years.

Mostly Cs You will most likely find yourself killed at the hands of another; whether this is a malicious homicide, an unfortunate accident, or something else entirely remains to be seen. It will involve a lot of blood, so if you don't look good in red consider your burial options and make your wishes known to your family ahead of time.

Mostly Ds Weather wreck: whether it be a tornado, unfortunately timed blizzard, spontaneous combustion in the summer sun or acid raining from the heavens, your doom is headed towards you from the skies above.

Mostly Es: You may actually live to a ripe old age and die of natural causes, which will be a shame. No one talks about women who die old and gray, and if you die in a catastrophe you'll make a prettier corpse. Try to live a little more vivaciously and see if you can get a more exciting outcome.

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