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Witch Weekly · September 13, 2020 – 11:41 PM

Fall Fashion Faux Pas

With the proper season now behind us, some may let their standards slacken with the idea that social events now somehow count for less in the grand scheme of things. Much to the contrary, fashion experts agree that fall fashion can be even more consequential, as each outfit you choose makes up a larger proportion of your image in general. Young ladies, particularly single ones, must make every event count. Follow our advice and avoid these fashion faux pas this season.

Almost No One Looks Good in Orange
Every autumn, ladies select fall colors for their dresses in a bid to seem festive, and at least one lady a season will try an orange dress. While orange is fine as an accent color, it takes a certain swarthy complexion to make it palatable in any significant amount, so most would do well to avoid it. We all remember, of course, how ghastly it looked when the new Mrs. Lestrange insisted on an orange dress last year!

False Modesty is Obvious
With the cooler weather, it can be tempting for young women to choose dresses with sleeves or a heavier cloak. This is perfectly appropriate. What is inappropriate is pairing covered arms and shoulders with an open neckline in order to put one's bosoms on full display. This tasteless modern trend must end; you are fooling no one with your false modesty, Miss Quinn!

Save your Charms for Dueling
Dresses that rely on magic to add a responsive flair such as changing colors or imitating falling leaves have become particularly fashionable lately, due to influences of Marcus Lytton's designers and socialites like Mrs. Ophelia Devine. While these can be done quite well, we recommend leaving such charmwork to the professionals. Many a girl has been subject to a poorly executed charm (even, on one memorable occasion, Mrs. Devine, who took a lengthy trip to the powder room after her color- changing dress accidentally left her with the appearance of a literal soggy bottom) and even when they work well, gentlemen are unlikely to be impressed by such antics. The only message it conveys is that the lady in question has too much time on her hands and no particularly useful hobbies on which to spend that time.

Unless you've Brought your Horse, Leave the Boots Behind
While this has not yet become fashionable, a group of young women at a hunting party last fall attempted to set a trend by incorporating elements of their riding habit, such as their boots, into their ballroom attire. It was, we suppose, meant to cast them in a charmingly rustic and athletic light, but it was far from charming. It implies a certain laziness and inattention to detail to reuse any piece of wardrobe for diverse events in a single day. Worse, it could carry the connotation that your wardrobe is incomplete, making you seem common and poor. Ladies, leave the riding gear (and, for that matter, the Quidditch gloves, the bicycling suit, the ice skates, and all other potential sports images omages) at home and wear your best to the ballroom.

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Issue #242 - A Lady's Guide to Socially Benefiting from Your Hogwarts House