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Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next?
#4
The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next?
It is one elopement after another these days, as every young lady in society refuses to be discouraged by the last scandal, and cannot be satisfied with a courtship, engagement, and advantageous marriage in the usual fashion. Below we lay out some of the most likely flight risks in the future, upon whom society should keep a close watch. Could the next place you spot them be sneaking off to Gretna Green?

Camilla Zabini.
Vibrant and successful hostess she might be, but thus far the younger Zabini sisters have been unable to find themselves a good match. If, given their impure bloodline, they continue to set their sights and standards higher than they can realistically reach, desperation may well drive Miss Zabini to make a hasty bid for happiness — or, at least, a drastic measure to see she does not end up alone.

January or October Lynch.
Their elder sister Mrs. February Umbridge may yet prove a cautionary tale, and the younger girls may be kept well away from their contentious sibling for their own good. But there is an equal possibility that either of these young ladies might find themselves swayed by some story of romance in their sister’s endeavour, or begin to feel oppressed by parents determined not to see a scandal repeated, and rebel against it in the most foolish manner.

Diana Fawley.
The former Miss Flint is proof that even the least likely suspects can prove to be just as flighty, fanciful, and ready to lose it all. Demure as she is, sources say she has almost too kind a heart — and has even been overheard vigorously extolling the virtues of a gentleman like, say, Mr. Julius Scrimgeour. And no one is oblivious to what disaster lies bound up in the Scrimgeour genes, surely, not even she.

Zelda Fisk.
By no means the most conventional in her family, the youngest Miss Fisk has gone against the grain before in choosing a Ministry career, and does not appear to have any hopeful prospects. But hark, you may cry, she is a sister-in-law of the Minister. She wouldn’t dare! To this, we can only say: this generation does so love a scandal.

Katherine Russell.
Isn’t it obvious? As the daughter of a famed murderer, elopement really is her only option.


But just as Eve was tempted to the apple, we must not pretend that a well-bred young lady will come to such a perilous decision on her own. No, indeed: they must be swayed by someone’s attentions, so perhaps after all it is our young men we must attempt to rein in. Too many freedoms afforded to them, and all at once they imagine they feel more, know better, can offer more than all the world. Which amongst them might be next?

We at Witch Weekly feel obliged to warn you of any man who has quidditch experience (the more professional, the worse); any wealthy man who has inherited too young, and knows not how to manage himself; the poor man who persuades you that money does not matter... but, most of all, the man who is always charming and pleasant, utterly devoted to you, and, deep down, you already know, just a little too good to be true.


Miss Camilla Zabini


The elder Miss Lynch


Miss Diana Fawley


The youngest Miss Fisk


Daughter of the infamous Thomas Russell



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Messages In This Thread
Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:24 PM
RE: Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:25 PM
RE: Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:25 PM
RE: Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:26 PM
RE: Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:26 PM
RE: Issue #217 - The Elopement Epidemic: Who will be next? - by Witch Weekly - September 29, 2019 – 4:26 PM
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